An excellent wife. . .I am NOT engaged

So this weekend has been spent with a lot of soul searching and thinking about things i don't really like to think about. i was challenged again on my ideas of marriage, submission, wifeness, etc. I feel like this topic is a "hush hush" topic in Christian circles UNLESS you are engaged. You shouldn't talk about getting married, shouldn't discuss wifey things, really should try and stay as far away from it as possible lest you "lust" after the desire to be married.

So that's what I did. Sure, i thought about it some(in the secret, quiet place of my room where no one knew), explored Prov 31 in a bible study(don't worry, the focus was NOT on being Godly wives, but Godly women), gazed longingly at books on becoming an excellent wife, but always strayed away from thinking too long and hard about it for fear i would get caught up in everything.

Now, to me, really thinking about it, that seems about the most absurd thing EVER!!! okay, maybe not ever, but close. Why should i wait until i'm engaged to prepare to be a wife? i'm not saying to let it consume my whole life but why can i not really begin exmaining on what i think about staying home, what submitting to my husband looks like, am i capable of doing that in a Godly way? why shouldn't i begin examining the Prov 31 woman in the context that she is...A WIFE.

I think i would be doing a great disservice to my husband if i waited until i was engaged to even begin examing this. Why spend the first 2 years of my marriage working through these things that could and probably should have been worked through before i even met him. What happens if i examine the requirements of submission and say "heck no! that is NOT for me" but i've already made a covenant before God that it WILL be for me. that could make for one tough road, all because christian society says to not think about marriage until you have a shiny rock on your finger.

Now hear me on this; I'm not saying i should be completely focused on this, forgetting all the great things taht God has for me now while i'm single. I should not lose sight of the people, work, and study He has called me to now. I just don't think there's anything wrong with REALLY preparing for marriage before i'm actually planning my wedding.

So now i'm off to read about becoming an excellent wife!!!:)

Things we do for love...

This weekend was spent helping Dan move out of his house in kirksville. Now, he has been living in columbia for about a month and a half now but took very few things from his house, as he has moved into a small apt. He had to be completely out of his house this weekend so we spent the weekend packing, making trips to columbia, trips to my house, and trips to the trash cans. At the end of this long, exhausting weekend, I am here thinking about all the things we crazy people do for love. So I thought i'd make a list. Some are things i've done for dan, some he's done for me, others that random people have done. Enjoy.

1.)After spending the whole weekend moving, and then finally relaxing for an hour..driving 20 miles outside of town to help the sig. other ensure that the mattress does not fall off the top of the vehicle.
2.) buying tie straps to take on your 20 mile journey
3.) Storing half a household in your shed or sunroom.
4.) Not saying "i told you so"
4.) Trying to be secretive at the farmer's market when you are there together, so that you can buy your sig other flowers.
5.)giving backrubs, when you're really the one who needs it.
6.)driving 3 hours in the middle of the night just because the other "needs you"
7.) not questioning their reasoning all the time, just trusting
8.) Continuing to like someone after they have asked your roommate out.
9.) Not throwing it in their face years later
10.) answering your phone at 3am and trying to muster excitement that they finally got that problem they had been working on for hours.
11.)cleaning their house
12.) giving a mopping lesson to someone who should know how to mop
13.)lying for you if you ever got in major legal trouble(this brings up a good question, would you lie for your spouse?)
14)making chocolate chip cookies just so they can eat the dough
15.)being completely honest
16.) loving them even if they make bad choices
17.) Forgiving them
18.)sleeping outside your sig other's window because their window is broken out and you know they are scared to be alone.
19) having a fake birthday party for you sig other because they are out of town on their birthday and knowing how important their bday's are to them, you set up a dining room like a bday party, cake, balloons, bday plates, hats, the whole sha-bang, and then you take pics of it and you in the pics, make a scrap book and send it with them on their trip, only to be opened on their actual bday..that way they feel they are having a party.
20.) driving several hours to suprise them after they return from a long trip without you.

This is just a small list. We people do some crazy things for love. What is it about love that makes us do these things?